Monday, May 30, 2005

The Blog Strikes Back (The pubbing we did yesterday part 2)

Act 1 Scene 1

The Scene is a busy Junction in Mumbai. In the background is the Rythym House one of Mumbai's well known landmarks. Two men are standing on the pavement talking to a girl. All three of them are reasonably well dressed. They look like they are waiting for someone. Its late in the evening about an hour after sunset. Most of the light is from street signs and lamposts.

Ruchika (the lady) : So krishna what are your plans.
Krishna (the fat guy): Parate and me are going pubbing. What about you.
Ruchika : Oh I am waiting for Vidhu a friend of mine
Krishna : Ok. Do you know of any good pubs/bars around here.
Ruchika : Yeah sports bar is here.
Krishna : Oye parate what shall we do.
Parate (the fatter guy): Lets just go to a pub and grab a couple of drinks and then some food.
Krishna: Lets wait till Vidhu gets here and then we can go to sports bar and Ruchika can chill out with that dude.
Parate: Okay, so hows the project going
Krishna: This blog is getting really boring.
Parate: Oye we are not in a blog. This is last thursday and its about how we go to a pub in bandra.
Krishna: But that wasnt all that much fun, right? so lets just keep it for the next episode of the blog.

Some dreamy music is played and the scene slowly changes. The background and set is still the same but now krishna is the only person on stage. The lighting is in such a way that Krishna's two shadows are clearly seen in the background. Krishna turns his back to the audience and begins his monlogue facing his shadows.

Krishna : So who are you guys. I havent meet you before.
Deep Voices : We are your alter egos.
Krishna : But isnt this the realy world?
Deep Voices : No its a blog. And in a blog there are always alter egos.
Krishna : There is no spoon. Thats why you cant bend it.
Deep Voices : (Hahaha, laughter) Dont try that logic on us. We invented it.
Krishna : But if you are my alter ego's then i must have me you before.
Deep Voice 1 : I am arthur miller. One of your alter egos. And it is actually me that is writing this blog in drama format.
Krishna : And what about the rest
Deep Voice 2 : I am Joe DeMaggio. (chuckles)
Krishna : What kind of stupid joke is that. OK so where's marilyn.
Deep Voice 2 : hehe , I am not really Joe , just pulling your leg. I am actually Grihastha, the householder stereotype. It is because of me that you are so happy spending money and want to earn more so that you have more to spend.
Krishna : I think thats enough for one blog dont you think? Since it should have been about parate we should ask him first.

Monday, May 23, 2005

Blog on the pubbing we did yesterday Part 1

Real World, Thursday 19 Th May 2005
Statutory Warning
Since we have come to the real world most people here are real people instead of being alter egos. But then again what we perceive in others is merely a reflection of ourselves.
"Hey Neo, is that statement grammatically correct?"
"No, I don’t think so, it’s philosophical. The aim of all philosophy is to make ungrammatical statements, and another thing this is the real world so you are on your own. No more Neo, Morpheus, Phaedrus bull shit. AND NO MORE GYAN"
"But I dole out gyan in the real world too Neo. Ask Allen, or any of the B Block chaps."
"I don’t know Allen, he's a real guy. I am just your alter ego."
"How come if I know Allen then you do too."
"No, I am Neo, I only know your trinity."
"You do? Tell me about her then"
"You can’t see beyond the choices you don’t understand. And bye. You've got to write about the pubbing or parate's going to get pissed"
Ok here goes.
I was about to leave office last Thursday when Parate happened to give me a call. Parate BBA calling.
"Hi Dude."
"Hi Krishna" (Krishna is another alter ego and parate's a real person)
"How’s life"
"Life is cool man. Where's your office."
... It turned out that parate was this side of town. So he came over to my office. I met him outside at the ground floor of the building.
"HI Parate. This is Ruchika my cointern"
"HI Ruchika" Ruchika is my cointern. She’s also an engineer and also from a B school. She's in the same lousy project of the same cheap marketing company as me. Now you are immediately thinking that’s the usual clue for an alter ego, but sorry Ruchika is a real life flesh and blood girl from the northern plains.
"So Krishna you want to go pubbing"
"Yeah I’d love to. What about you Ruchika"

This blog is getting scary. Too many real people and real events and emotions. I'll make it a part 1 and write the rest after regaining my mental stability. Like all sequels it sure will suck. But then I could do the George Lucas this and make it part 2 and call the sequel part 1. George Lucas is also a REAL PERSON...

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Welcome to the real world Neo.

I was six weeks into my summer project and things were not looking good. I had not done any awesome work, nor had i had a good time or enjoyed myself. I had basically managed to work really hard at nothing. I was feeling pretty frustrated and i don't know what got into me but i decided to give some friends a call.
"The orange number you have tried is currently unavailable. Please try later" After hearing that from most of my good friends i was beginning to get desperate. So i started alphabetically in the phone book. Before i knew it i was down to M.
Morpheus 9819871673.
Call. Trrrrt trrrrrrt. Trrrrrrt trrrrrrt.
"Hello. Morpheus here"
"Hi, this is beedi. We met the other day at the beach"
"Yes Neo, tell me."
"This is beedi, not Neo."
"I know who you are. The fact that you have called me is because you realize Neo, that your entire life has been a dream. A sad one but still a dream. You spend most of your life imagining yourself to be a stronger, faster, richer more powerful than you actually are. In essence you think that you are Neo and that this is the Matrix and you can change the rules.
Till now you have been able to avoid reality by creating alter egos. The sum total of your alter egos has now come full circle. Your own alter egos now realize that they were just sad creations of a pathetic imagination and refuse to bend the rules of the Matrix. In essence all your alter egos seem to be converging again in you. You have desperately been trying to create more a more images but each successive one deteriorates faster that the previous. The time has come for you to wake up.

You are a 24 year old obese, reasonably intelligent, boring, ugly , self-conscious loser. The year is 2005. The earth is still as it is. Capitalism and materialism are still the prime principles of the current world order. The reason you don't have a girlfriend is because you have nothing any sane girl would ever want....Wake up. Wake up to reality."

"But Morpheus what about all my great dreams of changing the world and ..."

"Most people give up that dream as a part of 'growing up' few ever live with that dream. And few among them get to see it fulfilled. Welcome to the real world Neo. Its not great but atleast its REAL"

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Another sea, Another breeze

"So Phaedrus how do you like the Arabian Sea?"
"Its a nice place. Though not as good as the beach near which I grew up"
It was the middle of my summer project and I was standing with Phaedrus on one of the many sea shores at Mumbai.
"Where are you doing your summers?"
"Ask me where i am doing life!". There u had it the same philosophical defense to avoid mundane realities. I knew he had made it to some cheap marketing company. I was surprised that he wasn't getting sent around rural India. I hadn't met Phaedrus for quite some time now. Maybe it was just that i was busy with summers and hence didn't make an effort. In a way i was glad that i was able to carry on without having gripe to phaedrus about life. Just as we were gazing into the Arabian Sea this big guy walks up to Phaedrus, gave him a big hug and then started talking really fast. Phaedrus introduced him to me as Morpheus, also and MBA types. He was working in some financial services firm in Mumbai. He and Phaedrus were really good friends it seemed. Morpheus was just like Phaedrus only more melodramatic. It was time for me to leave, so i made the polite gesture of asking Morpheus for his cell phone number. Little did i know what i was getting myself into.